Jeremy leaned against the rough brick wall of the clothes shop at the corner of Davey Place and Castle Street. He couldn’t remember if the shop was still a Monsoon and he didn’t check; another unresolved thought in his head was all the better.
He nodded to the big issue seller, closed his eyes and listened.
He could hear two off-key flautists busking down the street; the shuffling conversations of passersby; the thump of bass from the Panasonic shop; the Royal Arcade’s Christmas music; some Asian singer warbling from the Thai takeaway.
He couldn’t hear the voices.
What blissful cacophony.
This was an experiment in using a real-world setting and creating a sense of the place within the 100 words. That's why it's a bit more 'normal' than most of my flash... ;)
ReplyDeleteBefore I read your addendum, I was indeed thinking this seemed to take place in a more common setting than some of your other work.
ReplyDeleteYou did what you set out to do, then, so props -- I had a vivid image in my mind of exactly where he was. However, may I express my disappointment in the lack of zombies? (and why I should expect them is another discussion, LOL!)
Thanks, Rebecca. =)
ReplyDeleteCacophony was one of the first 101s I wrote, when I was still getting a feel for the shape of things here. I've held back on it because it's not as 'out there' as my usual fare, but it had to make an appearance some time. =)
Zombies, eh? Who knows what the voices are telling him...? ;)
The desire to escape the voices works, especially tightened down to this length. Good work, John.
ReplyDeleteThank you, John. =)
ReplyDeleteThe atmosphere and punchline ending are much bigger than the word count would suggest. Good work John.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Steve. Glad to hear it worked. =)
ReplyDelete