by John Xero
Gobbets of meat adorned the beast's barbed hide, like tufts of wool on a horrific hedgerow.
Harwen was on his knees, his crude sword hanging limply from a hand that a week ago had held a crook. Around him lay villagers and friends, armoured up and cut down.
The soldiers were gone to war but battle had come to Little Daleberry regardless, because Harwen had let his flock stray too near the caves.
The troll-thing, its rage sated, was shambling away.
Harwen tightened his grip, clenched his jaw and stood. He owed penance. He yelled and the beast turned back.
armoured up and cut down - love that!
ReplyDeletemarc nash
Thank you, Marc. =) I was really happy with that line, too. =)
DeleteMarc caught my favorite line. Very nice work to wring out of such a short space.
ReplyDeleteThank you, John, =)
DeleteFiiiggghhhttttt!!
ReplyDelete"..his crude sword hanging limply from a hand that a week ago had held a crook." I had to read this line twice 'cus, you know, I'm a child.
Still, love this!
It's a line that's trying hard, possibly a little too hard. ;)
DeleteThank you, Jack. =)
Remember when I read this the first time round and it still packs a punch. Top writing John.
ReplyDeleteCheers, Phil. =D
DeleteOh, brave call! I can feel the heat.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Cindy. =)
DeleteI too really liked the line "Armoured up and cut down."
ReplyDeleteAnother story small on the outside, and big on the inside John, brilliant.
For what it's worth, being in Harwen's place, I think I would have stayed very, very quiet. :-)
The Tardis of the storyworld... ;)
DeleteThank you, Steve. I think I would have hunkered down till the cost was clear too, but Harwen has an overdeveloped sense of honour... it's going to get him into trouble... ;)
(apologies to William Goldman for the butchered Princess Bride quote... ;) )
They've already said it but this is cool. I like the up/down line too. I think you pack a lot of story into these words. Go you!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Pete. =)
DeleteWhat an ending! A perfectly placed cliffhanger. Sometimes 100 words is simply not enough. ;)
ReplyDeleteThank you. =D
Delete